Planks Ahoy
by SquidwardTennisballs18
Summary: - Sick of her husband constantly neglecting her, Karen switches gears and two hints are Spongebob & abs.


Planks Ahoy - Sick of her husband constantly neglecting her, Karen switches gears and two hints are Spongebob & Mr. Krabs.

Characters

Spongebob Squarepants

Karen Plankton

Sheldon J. Plankton

Eugene H. Krabs

Spot

Squidward Tentacles (cameo)

The story starts at The Chum Bucket. Karen rolls inside with some good news. She approaches Spot.

KAREN: Hey Spot, have you by any chance see the evil one?

SPOT: Bark! Bark!

KAREN: Laboratory?

SPOT: Bark! Bark!

Spot swallows some chum which he actually likes.

KAREN: Well enjoy.

Karen rolls into the laboratory finding Plankton working on some gadget.

KAREN: Hey Plankton, guess what?!

Plankton pops up in annoyance and this increases when he bumps his head on his wrench.

PLANKTON: OW! Errgh! Can it woman! Can't you see that i'm working here!

KAREN: Well sorry Mr. Misery and Self Pity, I just wanted you to be surprised on what I have booked us on.

Plankton gets curious.

PLANKTON: A Krabby Patty Convention?!

KAREN: N..

PLANKTON: Sweet! If you can get us into a Krabby Patty Convention, that means an eating contest and if I knock out one of the contestants with my sleep gas, I can get a patty in no time! IT'S FOOL PROOF!

KAREN: It is not a Krabby Patty convention!

PLANKTON: Pfft, then bye.

KAREN: Don't you want to spend some quality time with me, your computer wife, on a luxurious cruise around town?!

PLANKTON: I get sea sick Karen! Remember in '96, I threw up all over the hotdog vender before we even left port! No way!

Karen wheels up and destroys Plankton's gadget with her laser beam.

PLANKTON: HEY! THAT WAS MY GADGET!

KAREN: I have had enough of you! Never do you ever want to spend time with your wife! All you do is obsess over that stupid patty formula! Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!

PLANKTON: Oh yeah! Are you gonna leave?! You'll do me a favor and stop holding me back!

KAREN: Is that so?!

PLANKTON: Yes so!

KAREN(coming to tears): I am out of here!

Karen rolls out of the Chum Bucket bawling her monitor out. Plankton sighs.

PLANKTON: Computers..

Spot strolls inside the laboratory.

PLANKTON: Looks like you're the new evil assistant Spot.

SPOT: Bark! Bark!

PLANKTON: Yep, bark bark indeed.

Plankton unveils his blueprints to try and make another gadget. Outside Karen sits by a bench continuing to bawl her eyes out. Karen then pulls up all of the photos on her hard drive she has taken with Plankton back in their happier days.

KAREN: 126 photos of me and Plankton.

She clicks them away to the garbage can.

KAREN: Goodbye!

She continues to cry. Spongebob exits the Krusty Krab, which is right behind the bench. Before he could throw some garbage away, he spots Karen crying.

SPONGEBOB: Karen.. is that you?

Karen spots Spongebob.

KAREN: Oh hey Spongebob, I'm too sad to play with you right now.

SPONGEBOB: Well are you okay? Why are you crying?

KAREN: Because! Mr. Sexist across the street loves your stupid patty formula more than me!

SPONGEBOB: Oh I see, uh,... Plankton has a severe case of the addictions.

KAREN: 74 times! That maniacal Creep!

SPONGEBOB: So.. you have no other place to go.

KAREN: Nope

SPONGEBOB: Hmmm, how about you join the Krusty Krew?

KAREN: You mean, work at the Krusty Krab?

SPONGEBOB: Sure! Mr. K loves money! He will get more!

KAREN: Wait if I get a job at the Krusty Krab, Plankton will grow jealous and angry real fast! Okay, count me in!

SPONGEBOB: Yay! I'll ask the boss man!

Scene cuts to Spongebob & Karen in Mr. Krabs' office.

SPONGEBOB: What do you mean you ain't hiring Mr. K?!

MR. KRABS: I don't want this robot of Plankton's working in me restaurant!

KAREN: ROBOT?!

SPONGEBOB: Come on Mr. Krabs! Please?!

MR. KRABS: No!

KAREN: Tightwad.

MR. KRABS: Cheapskate! You get it correct missy!

KAREN: Oh getting smart are we?

SPONGEBOB: You said you want to keep close tabs on Plankton when he is planning his next move, so why don't we use Karen at our disposal, to stop him?!

MR. KRABS: She is his wife you salamander! They could be in cahoots!

SPONGEBOB: Squidward's playing Kahoot right now.

Scene cuts to Squidward sitting on the toilet playing Kahoot on his phone.

SQUIDWARD(breaking the fourth wall): Do I have a line?

Back to the office.

KAREN: I'm outta here.

Karen begins rolling out.

SPONGEBOB: Karen wait! Mr. Krabs, this is my last bribe, what if you used Karen as a tool to gather intel you have never heard of before on Plankton, that way both you and her can get revenge on him, he just dumped her!

MR. KRABS: Hmmm

Spongebob & Karen stare at him, awaiting his final answer.

MR. KRABS: Errrghh! Fine! Intel only!

SPONGEBOB: Yay!

KAREN: I hope I made the right decision.

Mr. Krabs bestows the same work hat Spongebob & Squidward have onto Karen.

MR. KRABS: Now Miss Karen, what is you hus, uh I mean, separated hubby, up to right now?

KAREN: He is making some sort of gadget that does Neptune knows what and it involves money.

MR. KRABS: Plankton & money?! Ha! Why hasn't he invited me to play Monopoly?! Arrgh! Arrgh! Arrgh!

KAREN: Mr. Krabs, this is serious! If we want revenge, we need to take the gravity of this situation very responsibly!

MR. KRABS: The serious huh?

KAREN: Lightweight.

SPONGEBOB: Hmmm, if Plankton is using money, than we should be one step ahead of him. Mr. K, do you still have that piggy bank?

MR. KRABS: Do ye mean the one that I use to hide my unpaid, uh I mean totally paid (wink), electricity bills?

SPONGEBOB: Yeah! That one!

MR. KRABS: Forget it! No loans!

SPONGEBOB: Oh come on!

Karen fires a laser at Mr. Krabs' pants incinerating them! He covers the front of his tighty whities with a stack of dollar bills.

MR. KRABS(embarrassed): Aaah!

KAREN: LEND ME THE STUPID PIGGY BANK BEFORE I FIRE ANOTHER BEAM AT YOUR EYESTALKS!

MR. KRABS(fearful): Yes Ma'am! Uh I mean it, i mean Poobah.

KAREN: GO!

Mr. Krabs dashes into his office.

SPONGEBOB: So that's where I got Poobah from.

He returns with the piggy bank.

SPONGEBOB: Now what?

KAREN: Now we wait.

The three begin waiting for several moments..

SPONGEBOB: Want to play cards?

KAREN: Sure

MR. KRABS: I get first pawn.

At the Chum Bucket, the doors open and exiting is Plankton & Spot, with the new and improved money gadget.

PLANKTON: Perfect! With my new and IMPROVED Money Maker 68,046, I will be able to distract Skin Flit Crustaceous Fatso with enough dollar bills that could buy the Great Wall of China!

SPOT: Bark! Bark!

PLANKTON: And when Krubby Krabby is distracted, I will then blast beams into the Krusty Krab and catch any Krabby Patties in the crossfire!

SPOT: Bark! Bark!

PLANKTON: Eeh, well I have low warranty.

Plankton & Spot begin driving the gadget to the Krusty Krab.

SPONGEBOB: Yikes! They're here!

KAREN: Calm down Spongebob.

MR. KRABS: Or it is coming out of ye paycheck!

Karen takes note of paycheck and thinks of something while pulling out one of her own gadgets and the piggy bank. Plankton positions the money gun towards the ground.

PLANKTON: Hehehehe!

SPONGEBOB: Oh no!

Karen crosses her robotic arms and shows a smirk animation on her monitor.

Plankton fires…. Monopoly Money.

PLANKTON: WHAT?!

SPONGEBOB: What?

MR. KRABS: Arrghhrghhgrgh!

Krabs falls into a pile of milkshakes from laughing so much.

PLANKTON: WHAT GIVES?!

Karen wheels out of the Krusty Krab, still smirking.

KAREN: Hello , did you buy the Krabby Patty Secret Formula yet? I sure bought your misery just now with my replacer gadget.

Karen then reveals the real money inside the piggy bank that was teleported there from her own gadget.

PLANKTON: Karen? What are you doing in the Krusty Krab? AND WHY ARE YOU IN THEIR UNIFORM?!

KAREN: Oh wait, didn't you get the memo? I am no longer involved with the Chum Bucket, which means, I am a free butterfly!

Spongebob shutters at the word butterfly because, of a certain close up from a certain 2001 episode.

PLANKTON: Well I don't care! I have Spot and he is a much better evil companion! Right Spotty?!

Spot snacks on all of Plankton's T-Bone Steaks.

SPOT: Bark! Bark!

PLANKTON: I trained him to do that!

KAREN: And I trained in this.

SPONGEBOB: In what?

Krabs exits the Krusty Krab.

MR. KRABS: Hey did Paper Money Plankton buy himself a ticket to Loserville yet?

Karen grabs Mr. Krabs and shows a kiss animation on her monitor signifying her kissing him.

Spongebob's jaw drops in shock. Spot covers his eyes. Plankton begins to tremble.

PLANKTON: Ka, Ka, Karen?

Karen continues to kiss Mr. Krabs. Plankton forms an angry face, changes from green to red and grows a six pack along with heavy muscles.

PLANKTON: UNACCEPTABLE!

Plankton is much stronger when hurt and manages to lunge onto his rival and beat him senseless for lying even one claw on his Karen. After a huge and long beating, Mr. Krabs lays in the driveway horribly maimed & mugged by a microscopic organism smaller than his jar of tic tacs back home. Plankton calms down, returns to normal and turns his attention to Karen.

PLANKTON: I am so sorry I have been mistreating you Karen dear, it's just the desire for this formula, pains me so!

KAREN: So you learned the lesson.

PLANKTON: What lesson?

KAREN: That you need to pay attention to and love your wife more than your passions.

Plankton sighs. Spot jumps off the gadget and strolls up next to Plankton.

PLANKTON: Yes dear.

Plankton blasts the gadget out of existence with his laser watch before turning the watch off.

KAREN: Okay, I'll go back with you. Don't discredit me again!

PLANKTON: Whatever you say ma'am!

Karen & Plankton stroll back to the Chum Bucket.

PLANKTON: I'll order dinner! On me! Even biscuits for Spot!

SPOT: Bark! Bark!

The three enter and isolate inside the Chum Bucket. Spongebob wipes some tears of joy from his eyelids.

SPONGEBOB: So beautiful! Right Mr. K? Mr. K?

Mr. Krabs sighs.

MR. KRABS: I kissed a computer.


End file.
